Dear Nina,
I am a sophomore, and more remarkably, a virgin. I have been dating this guy for a couple of months and he’s great. He may even be “the one,” but I’m not sure if I’m ready. He’s been patient but he’s also sensitive and I know he sort of takes it personally that I am not absolutely positive about it. The thing is, he wants to bring me to his hometown to meet his parents over spring break. I feel like that would put us in serious relationship territory, like if I still don’t want to have sex with him after that, he’ll be really hurt. Should I get out of it, or get it over with?
–Prudence the Proud

First-Time Focker,
The implications of meeting the parents can range vastly, depending on the family. Some people bring prostitutes downstairs to open presents on Christmas morning, while others mention you only after you get engaged. So first try to gauge what it means to him, not necessarily what it would mean to your parents or whatever.
Onto the fun stuff: first of all, virginity seems to be getting pretty trendy around here. (Yeah! OC Virgins!) But when to “go all the way?” Clearly, I can’t tell you, but I do have advice for college virgins, both boys and girls, and those who wish to explore that uncharted land: people who wait till they are twenty-ish, which is undoubtedly getting late to lose it (though still not freakish), will remove that pesky chastity belt when either of the following things take place:
1. Fall in love, give that special someone the gift of that flower, being the best you ever had, the only one associated with intimacy on that level, make love, fireworks, two become one, awkward discomfort, the works.
2. Tired of waiting for Mr./Ms. Right, would appreciate getting laid, pronto, by whoever is nearest and least weird, so as to stop ducking shame-faced out of games of “I never” and see what all the fuss is about.
Whichever of these ends up sparking your decision, let it be your decision. You’ll have your whole adult life to become familiar with the ins-and-outs of pity sex, but please don’t start with your “sensitive” (read: horny) boyfriend.
–Nina

Dear Nina,
I have a fairly innocent yet undeniably obsessive crush on my dermatologist. This started weirding me out when I searched my epidermis for forgotten freckles, in hopes of finding an excuse to make yet more frequent appointments to show him the goods. But that’s not the only weird part: I think I like him because he looks exactly like me. Am I a terribly vain person?
–Mirror, Mirror

You’re so Vain...
Maybe you’re in love with yourself, but I doubt you’re really more vain than most. I certainly have had crushes on girls with side bangs and big noses, and I’m not even gay. Have you noticed the large number of look-alike couples on this campus? I think it’s just that we spend so much time looking at ourselves and our family members over the years that we develop a sensitive eye for some common “look,” we recognize and respond to it.

Or maybe it’s some kind of search for validation on your part, like, “if you look like me and you’re willing to do me, I must be pretty hot,” you know? This could only back-fire if s/he’s thinking the same thing. (Whoa, so many levels).

This explains why my short, swarthy cousin Joey is forever trying to slip me one, and will probably continue to whenever we meet at funerals in New Jersey. For you, though, this may be a great idea: he’s a rich young doctor, no? And would probably make a fabulous accessory.

You might get over it pretty quickly, or you might proposition your doctor while he looks at some cancerous ass-mole of yours. Either way, whatever.
–Nina